Blog Posts

What’s on my mind

Dies und dass

Dingen om te delen

EDS and Dysmorphia

Weggestoßen, abgestoßenabgetrennt sein, losgetrennt sein.Alles gewollt –alles gegebenDrauf sein –bei dir seinweg sein –allein seinmit mir im Reinen sein© Ricarda Jo. Eidmann*My brain tells me it a hundred times a day. “There is something wrong with you, these thoughts are no good, they are not normal.” I listen, I agree, but I see no way…

Medical Depression

The underground parking garage is in front of the hospital entrance. First, a tunnel and then two escalators lead me up from the dark basement of our society to the large, open building with so much glass that it seems to radiate light. Big windows and a glass ceiling that are supposed to radiate life,…

The Face of Pain

Chronic illness and the face of pain I look in the mirror, look at my skin, irritations, and pimples. My hair is sticking out in every direction. I’m looking at myself, but don’t see  myself. I avoid looking into my eyes. The eyes, the windows to the soul. A soul hidden by a wall of…

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” Simultaneously I am myself, the child I was, the old man I will be.”

Peter Matthiessen